A Person I Use to Know Daily Focus

A Person I Use to Know is a phrase that I created so many can relate too of that I blog about. 

We all were birthed. We all will die. We all will encounter or face our memory lane past walks of time compiling our perfections and seeing the mistakes that we made. Nothing announces the Person I Use to Know like time does. 

Time tells the tales of our lives through the actions that we did, committed, admitted or denied. Perhaps, if there is only one true judge upon this Earth - this judge - begins and ends with our self and the reflection of how time changes our external appearances and what we change internally about our self.

A Person I Use to Know can begin now as a daily focus to anyone who takes self-improvement seriously and responsibly for who you can be. 

To acknowledge, become aware and be presently mindful in every thing that you do, say or attempt in actions. Think twice before you do something. Reconsider those impulsive choices that you may regret tomorrow. Admit now that the Person You Use to Know - begins with today of what you choose to do. 

We all wish we could have a do-over in something of our life. I have never met one person in my 3 decades of life who wish something would have happened differently or chose a different route when presented with personal choices or who has lacked control of things happened to them - done by another.

This week - I have been working on the emotion of Sadness in the DBT. The verbal list of accomplices that link up with the emotion with Sadness is as long - as it is complex. 

Sadness really does hold hands with many others emotions. It can almost be like your chasing your tail and overwhelming at first - when learning and gaining new knowledge to respect and even embrace the harshness that emotions can do. 

I do believe that A Person I Use to Know - is in each of us & it is never to late to help our self where we need it most - when we are ready & accepting of new ideas and more than anything dedicated to one's self for positive changing efforts - that only solo - we can chose to make or decline.

But in learning the 8 primary emotions - that I have been weekly breaking down. I am learning how to become comfortable with them. Respect them. Internally process them and then let them freaking go. 

Imprisoning myself from something that I should have never been hostage myself to unconsciously and without awareness was so unhealthy and damaging. I do realize with new skills that I can indeed try something new to gain a control of emotions that I never fully knew I had.

To be aware, skillfully knowledgeable and to know emotions in a Wise Mind and Reasonable Mind aspect is liberating. To know that the human brain does scientifically have processes of an Emotional Mind, Reasonable Mind and a Wise Mind achievable goal is extraordinary to me. 

Even now, committing to my almost 3 weeks of this process and daily learning - I am in amazement of much learning to new and a new self to gain from it. I have almost filled up daily pen writing of 3 subjects of a 5 subject notebook with worksheet activities about my life of this positive altering mission of emotional education and DBT for myself.

I realize that I also do have an extreme personality flaw of being a 50% Emotional Mind by nature and nurture - but I can learn how to use that 50% Emotional Mind potentially wiser along with my Reasonable Mind and Wise Mind to create a better quality of life for myself and those who know and frequent me too. 

I have had much chaos and destruction that has risen by my choices when emotionally consumed. To get one's self in a knot of constantly assuming and speculating of things and of people that will probably never happen --- is the worst waste of energy that any human being can do to their brain and 3 minds and their emotional mind. Wanna set off explosions - keep speculating and assuming because it's the most destructive force of power that us humans have and use unconsciously! 

I was guilty to speculate and assume the worst of alot things in life - even when friendly to others or they to me - I'd internally be focusing on the overplaying of scenarios that would never likely happen. Granted, once in a blue moon sometimes, this can be productive but more than naught - it's detrimental, unhealthy and does waste the brain's resources to process other information that can be gained and used more wisely.

Some people truly are either naturally gifted or genetically balanced or even formally educated that they can control, maintain, and interact with their emotions safely, smart, logical, and rational as well as use these human tools of emotions to assist others. 

I am but am not - one of those people. Genetics and circumstances and my own personality highlights have sabotaged that for me since my birth almost 37 years ago. 

But fear not and fret not for those like me - who are accepting of the problems of their life that they did not create ---- but who want to learn and gain new skills to be one with the peaceful and the serenity offerings that emotions were meant to be and what the healthy processes are internally in the human brain and with the 5 senses. 

Dialectal Behavior Therapy is teaching me more about myself than I even realized I needed to know. But when desperation lands into one's life as the darkest shadows they ever experienced - sometimes - that is the only way for personal, positive change to occur. To be freed and forgiving to one's actions that hostage a person is the hardest things to ever let go of. It is hard. But it worth the effort to try.

I want to share what I have written this past week from the pages of my DBT and emotional learning lessons. I feel others can relate as well --- perhaps, by enlightening a few in my attempts of sharing. 

Read and decipher as you will. But be control in all aspects of your life. One day, you will wake up to realize that the skin, brain, and body that you now possess was inherited from A Person You Use to Know as your former self and what you did with time and choices. 

Make each daily count. The past is gone before we realize. Tomorrow isn't here yet. Today is all there is & all there will ever be.So give the person you are the daily focus you want and need so when you look into the mirror of A Person I Use to Know - you can be grateful for the very best friend you could be to yourself and knew that you tried when others said you should fail; that you didn't give up believing in yourself and achieving whatever you wished for.

My emotional study of Sadness and what this emotion was and where I hope to take the irony of this new positive Sadness to where I want it to be - when I am done with this emotional study of Sadness.

The symptoms of Sadness can be exhausting. I have experienced many. My Emotional Mind has took dominance for many years. 

My eyes hurt and swell. My head pounds from crying pain. My ears became hyper-sensitive adding to the stresses of headache of pain staking and excruciating tearful-sad cries as this. My heart aches and the physical touch becomes so tense that I could never release enough anger of the sorrowful pain of wet over flowing tears. My saliva increases so thick as an ocean-filled drowning in my mouth from the anxious taste of grief that has prior been in my life. The smell of nothingness but sorrow. A shovel of metal I sense and the grit of dirt I breathe and taste in these saddening exposures of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

But I deserve and do have to work to healthy perceptions as only I can about all emotions and this Sadness. I am damage to my 3 minds. Never giving my own validations of grief that I can choose to no longer hold me hostage. Using these new skillful tools to understand the values of what emotions were meant to do and be in the brain and body. Understanding and applying new skills to what they were not meant to be or do in the brain and body too.

My Wise Mind will comfort. My Reasonable Mind will support my strengths of Emotional Mind to get me through these bouts of grief. Observe - Describe - Participate engaging the 5 senses without judging my Emotional Mind will allow whatever emotion or emotional surprise that will occur to pass. 

My Wise Mind & Reasonable Mind will help me when I allow them too. Setbacks may occur and usually will - as this is accepting life and all the emotions that cross us. But it does not have to hostage me without my consent. I do not have to stay hostage in emotions no longer than I choose to be. I can stop myself of emotional overload by being mindfully present and realizing the peace I can gain and obtain in peace by these new tools.

My visions and eyes needs this intervention from sorrowful, grief, and sadness tears. They only want happy tears of the now. Good, uplifting, and all that feels good tears. Wise Mind and Reasonable Mind will assure me to focus on the good and not to harbor nor puddle anymore upon a grief of my life that I can not change and was powerless to stop. 

My ears and sounds wants celebration of life and death. Tears are a beautiful representation of the purpose-fulfillment and genuine completion in the beauty of birth and release of a peace to a life lived that passes into restful bliss. Their mission complete.

The same can be said for trauma, survivors, and wounds. For once upon a time, the information of emotions had their strengths of lessons gained or insight of strengths gained to overcome. But now, it is time to bury one's own experiences to move forward in a healthy manner, that sometimes - does take new skillful learning. To gain a life and personal value that has never been experienced before.

A new birth to one's 5 senses can be done. A survivor's gifts to self is letting go in an effective way that works for them. To learn new skills to safely execute the once untouchable. Touch it! Sense it! Smell it! See it! Hear it! To keep one's self captive to the pain created by trauma and vicious hurtful circumstances is to only to procrastinate and avoid a potential healthy way of new skill learning that could very well undo a damage that has been done by another.

The 3 minds and 5 senses are for each to know, explore, grow and enhance to repair, heal and enjoy. Enjoying a beautiful balance our wonderful human body and brain has created for all the glorious internal that resides in each of us - waiting for our own discovery of self. 

I deserve to smell the beauty and peaceful fragrance of nature that is present when visiting a loved ones grave. I deserve to represent that same of me with a past that will now be buried in myself too.

I deserve to taste the serenity of a balanced saliva that leaves a sweet taste of accomplishment. I survived. I conquered. I may have fell along the way and will always stumble - but I never gave in to the mud puddle taste of staying down even when medically they say I would. I will not and will not accept anything less for myself now!

I will continue to engage into a daily sharing of enjoying sweetness everywhere to everyone of the unique-beautiful flower arrangement we all are and how each of us contribute to the fertilization of our self - as much as we responsible to others.  Whoever said Peace and Serenity did not take work and effort apparently never visited the other side of town or the tracks less traveled.