How Long Does Recovery Take?

The answer of how long does recovery take is not a simple nor exact answer. I wish I could say that it was. But the time it takes of recovery is a truth that can only be answered by each indivdiually differently. There is no quick fix nor is there a specific time frame.A person of recovery did not experience the problem overnight and in a day it will not be fixed either.

The only person who knows how long recovery will take for you - is you. How is that you ask?

Recovery is a personal acceptance that comes from individual awareness that a problem was experienced that we want solved or help in making the problem stop. A problem occurs that requires a solution. This is what recovery is.

How long did the problem exist?
What were the consequences of this problem?
Who contributed to this problem?
How did I hinder or progress the solution to this problem?

Whether recovery occurs because of trauma - events - substance abuse - addiction - medical conditions or whatever the issue maybe; recovery is knowing a problem exists and wanting to achieve a solution to stop the problem and prevent the problem from happening again.

The recovery process takes time depending on the factors of the problem. For instance, a gambler can stop gambling by not going to places that allow them to gamble and not accessing resources that allows them to gamble. This is easier said than done for a gambling addict. A gambler must not associate nor participate in the places with those they gambled with when first starting recovery. Medically there are reasons why some are more susceptible to addictions than others. These are answers a gambler must seek to know why they are addicted and to work through them. Not deny them. Will the urge ever completely go away that a gambler will not be tempted to gamble? Not always. But can a gambler stop doing the activities that produced their addiction? Yes.

The same is said of any individual in recovery. PTSD survivors or victims of trauma must not do the things they did that remind them of the abuse. Why? Because the people or places that remind them of the abuse can produce the same terrifying effects of reliving the traumatic moments. This is a biological effect of the human body, as well as, an inability to cope - rationalize emotionally, and produce healthy thought processes that will counteract human biology to decrease flashbacks, nightmares, and horrible intensities. PTSD is a forced and uncontrolled event. The body will react in biochemistry to produce life saving measures. When this process becomes altered with PTSD - the survivor must realize they did not chose this but they can learn new skills of how they react to it. It's a process of recovery just as grieving is a natural process when someone we love passes on. PTSD does not mean life will end. PTSD only means that the patient has work to do to progress past the problems that PTSD gave to them. To restore what was lost so that it maybe found.

Will these effects be temporary or will they be permanent? This depends on the individual depths a PTSD survivor and a victim endured of their problems. It depends on how willing they are to be honest with self and their dedication to their recovery. It depends on how much they want to get better and how much they are willing to work to achieve this with new skills to help them recover.

In our human body, we have many body systems that function to sustain our life. These body systems are unique to every individual person. But internally, most are primarily equal in biology by the emotions and thoughts we process that tell our bodies what to do.

If we think and feel unhealthy, our bodies react as such. If we think and feel healthy, our bodies will react to this as such. If we think and feel of fear, our bodies will secrete whatever is needed to get past this fear. We cannot always control the stimuli around us - but our thoughts and emotions of how we process life can make or break our mental and medical health in a sense. Because our thoughts and emotions react chemically by our conscience within.

When we experience fear or threat, our Autonomic System produces the chemicals we need to survive. This is an automatic response within to help us survive the danger or fears we feel inside. Even if these threats or fear are not real, our bodies respond as if it were through our emotions and thoughts.

Our heart rate will increase without our conscience awareness or control. Our pupils may dilate to allow more light in so that we can see to get away from the threat that harms us. Our liver will produce more glucose to give us energy to flee or run. Our digestive processes will slow down, so more energy can be given to the muscles and our bodies to where it is needed.

Without awareness of how our emotions and thoughts are affecting our bodies and our health; we could be contributing to our health or medical conditions because of how we think and what we feel on the inside. It is hard to ask a doctor to help internally when we cannot relate our secrets to them. But every person in recovery deserves to be honest about their inside thoughts and emotions to help their self; even if, you share this with no one. Therapy and recovery are a personal choice to get better.

But if we are not careful, we could be hindering our recovery. If we do not know the problem or deny the effects or are not seeking qualified information than we can be prolonging the process.  We must accept personal responsibility and accountability even in recovery. Ignorance of the law does not grant pardon when breaking the law.

Recovery is a lifestyle change and commitment of dedication that one must not ever get weary of and to keep trying. We must learn how to stop using the old ways of thinking or feeling to help us in our recovery. These old thoughts and feelings can actually be hurting us worse than the initial problem that put us in recovery to begin with. How is this?

Consider this. When a baby is born, the baby cries when hungry. The child cannot tell you they are verbally hungry. They lack the skills to communicate because they have not learned them. Their body automatically does the talking for them through crying. The skill to cry allows them to communicate the automatic processes of their hunger pains they feel and how their body needs more energy to help the child develop and grow. ANS does the same processes of fight or flight response until we teach our body we do not have to live like that anymore by learning new ways to deal and cope with our emotions and our thoughts.

This does not mean that people of recovery are limited in life because of their recovery. It only means they require different skills, emotional learning, and healthier thought processing to achieve the goals they want to reach in life.

As human beings, we tend to speculate, assume, and cling to the methods we have used in our past to keep us alive and to survive through the present day. However, just as children develop and grow and learn to communicate effectively - so should we by the circumstances, mistakes, consequences and lessons we learn along the way.

Recovery is a complex set of problems that affects the mind, body, thoughts, and emotions. Depending on the problems that caused a person to seek recovery, each problem must be addressed individually and catered to the individual's symptoms and problems produced by the source of origin.

Many times, physicians and professionals seek to give a quick fix solution to the problem/problems of recovery.

Example: Here's a simple pill that will help you and the rest is something you will have to live and survive with. What more can patients do to help their self to improve their health? What more can those in recovery do to help their self too?

Our social and economical culture thrive off of instant gratification. We want solutions today for our problems that occur this instant. We want material possessions that we do not have to work for nor wait upon. Everything is mostly of an instant gratification lifestyle every where we look. Sadly, instant gratification mindsets occur with thoughts and feelings associated with recovery too.

We want those in recovery to be better right now. We want those struggling that endured trauma or suffer from PTSD to get better today. We want an alcoholic to quit drinking today or that smoker to stop it now. We want the gambler to stop. We are not comfortable with the problems of others when it conflicts with our instant gratification lifestyles. We do not want to understand nor assist those in recovery because their progress is not happening fast enough. We want to spend all of our money today so we can complain we have nothing in savings tomorrow.This is what instant gratification does.

Recovery is a delayed gratification process only. It is having the ability to be honest about the problems you endured that caused you to reach out for help to get better. Many times, emotions and thoughts are usually neglected in today's best efforts of support and professional help because emotions and thoughts are not considered health issues nor real medical issues - but they should be especially when the biology and biochemistry of the human being details the specifics of how thoughts and emotions can be detrimental to a person's health and their recovery.

A person who is not aware of how their thoughts and emotions affect their bodies or how their inability to control their emotions and thoughts can produce harmful consequences in their recovery efforts and can produce irreversible damage to their internal body organs and systems.

Most people want balance in their life. To have enough money for their needs with stress-free worries of finances. To have a job that balances time at their home life and professional life. To create a real sense of security, honesty, and truthful sense of balance. Most never have this nor can achieve this because the problems increase faster than most are able to solve them because they are not aware about instant gratification or they deny it exists.

Instant gratification is the process of wanting fast solutions with quick fixes now. Delayed gratification is using patience and having realistic goals of facts and evidence to solve problems effectively and permanently.

Gratification of individual thoughts and emotions will determine how a body, medical health, and overall lifestyle endures and overcome problems to survive and live. 

For instance, child sexual abuse survivors of Incest suffered problems that were produced by forceful, fearful, and manipulating abuser/abusers. Their first sexual encounters were not of choice or at their control. This was not a normal sexual experience. They were violated emotionally, physically, mentality, and sexually violated beyond their ability to stop it or to control it. Each harmful abuse occurrence that came from verbal, physical, or sexual harm from their abuser also forced their bodies to respond biologically against the victim's control. The Autonomic System produced an increased state of stress so the victim could survive the attack of abuse. The duration of this type of abuse will determine the duration and type of recovery a survivor must endure to recover. Their brain and body reacted naturally because of this unnatural and forced event.

To stop this process of damage produced by this trauma requires learning new skills of coping, thinking, and emotional understanding. To gain back what the abuser took and to teach one's body how to self-soothe and self-mend.

Gambling takes away time and money from a survivor. A drug addict loses time, money, family, and a sense of trusting their instincts and acting upon them. In recovery, one must learn how to take back these essentials of life that these problems took from them. Grief is a reality of recovery for every individual that must not be denied when helping them.

If a child tells a lie to their parent about stealing $2.00 from their wallet - a parent will be angry, hurt, and emotionally upset at the child that stole money from them. They will seek to teach the child that it is wrong to take money from others and to find ways to prevent this from happening again. They will also try to teach their child new skills so the child will understand why it was wrong they took the money and how not to let those feelings or thoughts control them - so the child will not steal in the future. The child maybe disciplined to help them understand why it was wrong too.

With recovery, it is about learning new skills and healthier coping habits to stop the damages done by the problems of abuse.

A person of recovery is the only one who can truly say what they feel and the thoughts they have about their problems. Only they can analyze the source of the problem that hurt them. Only they can be honest how their emotions and thoughts affected their problem. Only they can work to understand their actions. Only they can accept accountability in their recovery. Only they can work and learn new skills to help prevent them from relapsing in recovery.

Instant gratification teaches us that problems exist and we can ignore them or deny them until the problems escalate so high that reality is all we all have left to face of the destruction that has happened.So if instant gratification is the problem for most in recovery - what is the solution? Delayed gratification.

Recovery is a delayed gratification process. It means to immediately stop the problem by admitting it exists. It means working toward awareness, learning, and maturing toward a larger goal of healing to focus on that of what will be gained instead of, what was lost. Instant gratification is a false sense of hope created by fast results that are not effective nor long-term.

By admitting our problems that exist within and working to find new ways to view old things; we can truly overcome anything.

DBT and CBT therapy are two methods used for different purposes of teaching self-help techniques to produce delayed gratification.

Most will only recommend use of these therapies if the symptoms fit in the instant gratification box of one size fits all solutions. We are not the same genetics with the same scenarios and experiences to work with. Recovery should never be the same remedies. One tool and skill may not help one person, but it can help another. Instant gratification produces a closed mind. Do not be limited in recovery by one opinion or one option that does not work. Research methods and try many to find one that works for you.

Recovery teaches us that each person is an individual, even if, the program remedies do not always work effectively. This valuable asset of recovery is a gift that starts the healing through individualism. Many times individuality is stolen or taken from a person who seeks recovery. The process of recovery helps  those to find tools and new skills so they can develop their true self.

Individuality is what most do lack that seek recovery help. Why? Because the problems most endure of recovery are usually produced by others through force or common interests to gain instant gratification.

No matter who caused or helped in the process to create the problem - it is still the responsibility of each person to acknowledge their problems and work to solve them to prevent them from happening again.

Delayed gratification is the only way to view and succeed at recovery and to effectively solve any problem that one faces.

Yes - it will hard. Yes - others may never understand. Yes - others may get mad at you or offended by your progression in recovery because they miss the old person you used to be when you were their instant gratifying friend, family, or associate. That's their problem they have to solve. Not yours.

Your life is your problems to solve. Their life is their problems to solve.

Every one deserves to create memories they want to cherish. Every one deserves new memories to counteract the bad memories of mistakes or harm done to them. Every one deserves to start new in their life to overcome the mistakes or problems they have experienced so these problems won't happen again. Recovery is caring more about today and tomorrow than the past that has always happened and cannot be changed. The past can only be accepted and worked through to make today and tomorrow better.

Create a list of problems you thought about or felt in your life. Be honest.
Did these problems occur because of others?
Did these problems occur because of the choices you made and the consequences you created?
Were some of these problems beyond your control?
What have you done to stop the problem?
What have you done to create a solution?
Why do you want a problem/problems to stop?

If you could teach one person about your problems and how you solved it - what would it be?  If you could teach one person what you learning in recovery - what would it be? 

Recovery is a lifestyle change that affects what we do externally in our actions but also it changes our negative emotions and negative thoughts into positive ones. If recovery is not helping you to learn this, do not give up on your self and forgive them for not knowing or understanding the help you need. Keep seeking. You will find the tools and skills you need.  Recovery is not on time limit - do not treat it as such either.

Consider the invention of a bicycle or automobile when feeling impatient. How many probably laughed at the notion of transportation that was possible with two wheels and four wheels? What did the inventors endure of rejections before they finally got acceptance? Their delayed gratification of never giving up to create what they wanted occurred because of their plans and dedication to that plan. They had already envisioned and focused on the end result even when met with denial. They overcame. We now have transportation because they focused on the bigger picture than the immediate present. We must do this also.

We can't change other people. We can only change self of how we deal with our problems, cope with our problems, and what we feel and think about problems.

Bodies in recovery endure excessive stress overloads that require stopping, understanding, and learning how to do new things in this life to counteract and stop the negative effects and stopping the things that keep hurting us. If others will not teach the elements needed to overcome the problems than it is left up to the individual in recovery - to do it for yourself.

You are worth it to find help for your problems. Many live in an instant gratification life afforded the experiences and opportunities that come from others who do their worrying,controlling, concealing or covering-up of their problems. Denial and enabling of problems is a bigger issue that our culture faces than any hardship recovery places on a person. Why? Because you are solving your problems. Other are not.

Work with what you have and be content with it. Do what you can. Learn what you can. Grow where you can. Appreciate the skills you have. Never be afraid to seek and learn new skills to help you. Be patient in your recovery.

Do not be offended when others ask you about your recovery. Be honest. You can share with them but be realistic that you can not make them understand. Be aware to know that the ones who do share with that understand; will be grateful and appreciate you for your efforts of recovery.

Appreciate delayed gratification through the math of life.

A child abuse victim spends an average of 18 years in hell until they are an adult. The next 60 years of their life is by the choices they decide and the consequences they create - no one else. Even if recovery takes half of their adult life to do; the investment to learn and mature past traumatic problems will be worth it to live and enjoy life beyond the abuse. Look at the big picture and focus on the years waiting to be lived. The past is only there to learn from and grow from and to never repeat its mistakes again.

A gambler wastes 10 years of life and $1 million on a high stake game never to be won. 10 years of life is gone. Incarceration of 5 years and $1 million restitution are the consequences of the crime committed. The gambler can't change the past. But a gambler can learn new lessons to rebuild a new and better future experience because of the hard lessons experienced so it will never happen again. Mistakes cost money but becomes even more expensive when denial is embraced more than reality of facts and evidence.

In 60 years of delayed gratification living - we can learn the value of relationships,time,money, and our health. We will create plans. We will work more to preventing and solving problems than creating them.

In 60 years of instant gratification living - we are taught the trail of destruction in marriages, partnerships, relationships, families, child neglect, and financial misfortunes. This focus only gives us what we want versus the priorities of what we need to a healthy and balanced life. This unhealthy focus of impulsiveness and immaturity does not increase our maturity and responsibility of our choices and the consequences we produce. Negative is all we have with instant gratification.

Instant gratification and delayed gratification are choices we make that begin with our thoughts and emotions and how we react in life. We don't have to settle for less of a life because we take a momentarily break for recovery. It is through recovery we admit our problems, face our problems, and conquer our problems to ensure our past mistakes or mistakes of others do not repeat and to protect and prevent others from enduring the same fate that can be prevented.